It’s the match you’ve been waiting for, Halo vs Starcraft, in the ultimate battle royal. Because of the striking parallelism of the two teams, the matches should be fairly even. The event will kick off with the Flood vs the Zerg to see which villainous organic species will reign king. Next, the Covenant will face off against the Protoss in an energy weapon battle full of invisibility and deception. Next, the Spartans will square off in a bloody bullet offensive against the Terran. Finally, the main match up will feature Master “Macho” Chief, the leader of the Halo team, against Sarah “Sick-nasty” Kerrigan, leader of the Starcraft team, in a one-on-one fight to the death. Who will claim bragging rights in this universal smack-down? Tune in to The A Button tonight at 8pm EST to watch the carnage live! (Ask your local cable provider for availability of The A Button Network in your area)

Maxis and EA know their customer base very well and have accommodated players by allowing them to make movies in the new Sims 3. Giving the players this option inevitably opens the door for players to express themselves in several unique ways. Players can make soap operas or record parties to show off to their friends, but we all really know what it will be used for: Porn. Everyone who has too much free time and has ever gotten bored with The Sims has looked at their sims naked and gettin’ it on (don’t pretend you haven’t). This seems to be so true that 1 Night In Paris has been remade using The Sims 3. Paris Hilton has heard about this new remake and refused to comment on it when we sent 30 emails about it to her website. Now if you’re looking for a review of the remake, I suggest you try it for yourself.

A special thanks to Nathan Casassa!

The A Button has been up and running for a month now. My stats say that over 3800 people have been by to check us out  in that short amount of time.  I hope we can continue like this and keep strong.

More funny to come!

Google has their hands in everything these days, and we mean everything. Google has products and services for searching, website analysis, advertising, telephones, cell phones, email, calenders, office programs, web browsing, and everything else anybody has ever wanted to do with their computer, except games. Google now brings you the Google gaming console, known simply as Dual Cerebral. The console runs a super version of Android known as “Wedding Cake” and has two slot loading Blu-ray drives, thus the use of the word dual.

Because two Blu-ray discs can be read at once, developers will have the option of creating two-disc games that can take up to 100 GB of space by using two discs instead of one, which should almost be enough room to fit the next Metal Gear Solid game’s cinematics. The underlying Android software has been optimized to handle the input from both drives and to take advantage of multicore processors, which is quite handy because the Dual Cerebral console has two unique multicore processors that run at 6 gigahertz each, and that’s without a fancy cooling rig.

These two processors have been formed into a single architecture so complex, no one is quite sure where Google got the technology for it, considering Google is primarily a software company. Of course the main method of researchology these days is Googling something when we don’t know about it, so perhaps there is a cover-up in place? Could Google have access to alien technology?

It wouldn’t surprise us.

Today is being hailed as a monumentous occasion: Valve has finally developed their first Playstation 3 game and it appears to be an even less finished version of Left For Dead. Valve has stated that because of the high cost and difficulty of developing and porting on the PS3, the game will cost $70 and will only come with one map, 50 zombies, and a single bullet for the players’ pistols. They also noted that player suicide is indeed possible, but only with the purchase of the company’s first PS3 add-on pack, which will be available next month for $20 on PSN. Anyone feeling Left for Dead?

The plasmids in Bioshock allowed players to shoot bees, fire, electricity, ice, and do all kinds of other super human things. In Bioshock 2, players will be able to play as a big daddy and the plasmids have been updated  as well to revise the game and keep it feeling fresh. Shooting blood, frogs, and locusts are just some of the new features in Bioshock 2, along with having to hide from the Big Sister if a smear of lamb’s blood is not on your door by midnight. Once we saw the new ability that allows players to part the sea around the city of Rapture, we realized that the developers have really gone all out with this one and the powers that are available to the players. As for the plot, who cares? Games these days are sold on flashy graphics, realistic environments, and intricate multiplayer modes that instill an addiction to downloadable content to keeps players paying game companies extra money for content that was withheld from the initial release.

The original Guitar Hero was aimed at teenagers to give them a way to play and interact with music in a fun video game format. Now that the Guitar Hero franchise has built itself up, Activision is spreading out who they market towards. They are slowly pulling middle aged fogies into the gaming market as a target demographic. It started with Guitar Hero: Aerosmith, but only captured the cool middle aged people that like music that is played with instruments. They are now attempting to capture everyone else who was 18 in 1972 and wore platform shoes (and didn’t die from embarrassment). Guitar Hero: ABBA is the spawn of this branched out marketing ploy and seems to only use the microphone in-game, thus making it a glorified karaoke system that can actually measure how much you suck at “Dancing Queen.” All we can say here at the A Button is this: finally, a game we can all agree to never buy or to at least carry home in a brown bag to hide our shame if we do.

Picture Credit to Andre Comfort. Thanks Andre!

The Little Big Planet developers have released downloadable content costume packages for almost every game, holiday, or movie they could milk. The developers even made people pay extra money to use guns in the game. GUNS SHOULD NEVER BE AN ADD-ON DAMMIT! It’s common courtesy to include weapons and we all know it. But now, in an attempt to disrespect their fanbase even more, the LBP developers have released an “adult” costume pack to allow players to dress sack people with lingerie in their wildest fantasies. The new levels associated with this pack seem to just be street corners with even more pimped out versions of the original cars in LBP. Female sack players have the option to pick clothing from the entire Victoria’s Secret catalog, while male sack players can choose from wife beaters, rings, pendants, giant hats, money clips, and canes. New moves have been added to the characters and all 35 of them seem to be different ways to slap the other players.

In order to compete with Massive Action Game on the Playstation 3, Microsoft has started development on Giant Bloody Wargame, or GBA for short. The game will feature online multiplayer with games that have a capacity of up to 738 players. When asked how Microsoft came to this seemingly random number for the server capacity, they said they the rolled fifty 20 sided dice and got 738. It sounded like a big enough number, so they kept it. In order to live up to the “bloody” part of its name, the developers made sure that characters had fully destructible body parts and that in game characters lose blood at an alarming rate once they’ve been shot. (Just like in real life!)  Apprently some sacrifices had to be made to get server capacity up to this level while still rendering and keeping track of all of that blood. The servers couldn’t handle things like “multiple weapons” and ” big maps” if they were to keep up to speed while keeping track of the 738 players. Thus, all of the maps seem to be about the same size of a normal 32 player map and only have one kind of gun available: the derringer. You can look forward to this quircky maul fest around Christmas time of 2010.