The year was 2003 and a hit 90’s rapper, PaRappa the Rapper, had just been found dead in his apartment, shot between the eyes, still clutching a microphone. No clues were to be found and thus the murder case fell into the cold case files. Move forward to today. Alex Rigopulos, co-founder of Harmonix, the original maker of Guitar Hero and maker of the Rock Band series, is pulled over for speeding. The officer becomes suspicious and performs a routine check of Rigpulos’ car only to find a microphone with the initials PRR engraved on it and an ounce of marijuana in the trunk. Rigopulos is quickly taken into custody and the microphone is sent to the forensics department. Hours later, DNA tests from the microphone confirm that it is a backup microphone belonging to PaRappa the Rapper. A full investigation has been launched and multiple Harmonix employees have been taken into custody. The A Button will keep you up-to-date should any more details unfold.

Final Fantasy XIV picks up where FF XII left off by giving players an even better FFMMORPG. Final Fantasy XIV changes things up though. Player’s don’t have levels and instead become stronger and more effective through better items, such as swords. If you have played any kind of Final Fantasy or Final Fantasy related games before, you are well aware that the bigger and awesomer the sword, the better the main character is. So, it comes as no surprise that FF XIV will have swords that are 10+ feet long, shoot lasers, raise the dead, and cure AIDS. Yes, in the world of FF XIV, over-compensating is a masterful art that only the most dedicated digital socialite can wield with power and persuasion.

In Batman’s most recent campaign against crime, he takes the fight to the villains and gets his hands dirty in Arkham Asylum. Due to the fact that the Joker trapped Batman in Arkham Asylum against his will and by surprise, no one is back at Wayne Manor to babysit pants-less Robin (Alfred went on vacation apparently). Since then, there have been those who have made attempts on the boy wonder’s life. Reports say that Robin defended himself from these henchmen by hiding in Wayne Manor and setting traps in various locations for the thugs. Traps included hot door handles, buckets of paint, and tar and feathers. The latest reports say that Robin is managing against these threats and will be on his own until the police figure out what to do about that whole bomb threat situation with the Joker.

A new Dance Dance Revolution  spinoff, Breakdance Revolution, is being released by Konami for the Nintendo Wii in an attempt to take back the music gaming market. The game will feature hip hop and rap music, as opposed to the rock music that currently dominates the music gaming industry. While the original DDR came with a dance pad, Breakdance Revolution will  come with a wearable beanie and a flattened cardboard box as a dancing pad, both with wireless sensors to detect the player’s fly moves.

At a recent press conference, Will Smith warned that the new PS3 slim was to be feared, even more so than the original PS3, due to the console’s better and faster processor. “I saw a woman’s purse get stolen by a PS3 Slim the other days. These machines, one could even say ‘robots,’ should not be trusted. This new PS3 is just bad news for us all.” Those at the press conference criticized Smith and said that the PS3 was designed to help and entertain people. No one understood why a PS3 could or even would steal a purse. Will Smith’s reaction to this criticism was, “Do I look like I care what you think? Do I look like I give a s**t what you think?”

We understand Will Smith, and when the the PS3 iRobot/Terminator apocalypse begins, we have your back.

The A Button was fortunate enough to host an interview with Old Snake about his retirement following Metal Gear Solid 4.

Kenneth: So Snake, what have you been up to after the events that transpired with Liquid Ocelot?

Snake: The military put me in a home.

Kenneth: A retirement home?

Snake: Yes a god d@%# retirement home.

Kenneth: I’m sorry to hear that. What is it like there?

Snake: The nurses steal.

Kenneth: How do you know?

Snake: Because I caught Gloria taking my watch while I was napping.

Kenneth: What did you do then?

Snake: I killed her.

Kenneth: And the nursing home didn’t have a problem with that?

Snake: They’re scared of me.

Kenneth: I think we have enough for the interview Snake, Thank you for your time.

Snake: You said I could have apple sauce.

After years of peace between the Biggie Donkey Kong and Tupac Mario clans, a feud has broken out once again after an attempt on Mario’s life was made while he was on the way to see Donkey Kong. The attempt took place in the lobby of Donkey Kongs’s recording studio, but fortunately failed. The attackers all threw barrels at Mario, thus causing Mario to blame Donkey Kong for the attack. Days after the attack, Mario released a song off his upcoming album saying that he had slept with Candy Kong, Donkey Kong’s current girlfriend. Fans of each clan want retaliation and revenge. What will happen next remains unknown.

Not all schools are fortunate enough to have luxurious things like books, paper, and pens for students. Evergreen Middle School is among these schools, especially after the recession hit and their government funding was lowered. The students needed to learn though, so one resourceful seventh grade science teacher, Rich Robinson, turned to the power of computers to teach his children. He installed his copy of Spore on his work computer and hooked it up to the television to show the students. “The kids loved going through the levels and battling others online. We ran into a few issues with sporn that led to disciplinary action but once we got the ground rules taken care of, it went pretty well. I feel the kids really learned how evolution works in a fun way,” said Rich Robinson.

On a darker note, none of the children in Rich Robinson’s class managed to pass the science section of the statewide standardized test. When asked when the dinosaurs roamed the Earth, many of the children put “the Creature Stage.”

EA has announced that the FIFA series of soccer video games will be canceled and FIFA 2010 will not be released due to financial pressures caused by the global recession. One spokesman went on record saying, “We are all in hard times together and EA Sports cannot afford to make any mistakes that could result in a financial loss. Seriously, who plays soccer anymore anyway? Be sure to pick up Madden 2010 though!”