News of Tekken 6’s upcoming release has made waves in the large Tekken 5 community of 14 people. The majority of gamers that have heard about the fifth sequel (fiquel? fifthel?) has left many people with puzzled looks, shrugged shoulders and the word “meh.” The A Button conducted random interviews with random pedestrians to see what the people think of the new Tekken game. Here are some of their responses:

Nathan: “That’s the game like Mortal Kombat without the cool, right?”

Adam: “What’s Tekken?”

Eric: “Personally, I’m waiting on Soul Calibur 5, since it has like…weapons and stuff.”

War Protester

Type:     Passive
Health:     15
Speed:     50%

The War Protester is Team Fortress 2’s class that tries to send a good message to the kiddies by not advocating war. His weapons include a picket sign, a megaphone, and an unsteady but emotional grasp on the topic he is protesting. His main strength is employed on control point maps in which he can inhibit attackers from getting to the control point until he dies. Until then, he forms a one man picket wall and yells about how violence and imperialism are not the answer while using one or two examples out of context.

Biography:
A heavy drinker and community college drop out, the War Protester has taken enough Political Science courses to know too much about his rights and maybe one thing about global politics.

On Thursday, October 1, James Gladoux was walking through the forest while on a hike with his eight year old daughter when he spotted what appeared to be a professional wrestling game for the Xbox 360. The interesting part is that the game was dated for 2010. Wrestling games, thought to be long extinct, mostly existed in the 1980s through the 1990s. The species died off in the early 2000s when everyone finally didn’t care anymore and stopped watching actual wresting on television. Scientists are analyzing the game to test its authenticity. Many questions arise if the game is indeed found to be real. Where did it come from? Why was it there? Who would actually play this game?

Halo 3: ODST is an expansion to Halo 3 that is based on a sub-plot of the events of Halo 2 and Halo 3. The game comes out tomorrow with Halo: Reach to follow one year later in the Fall of 2010. 2011 will bring the seventh game in the Halo series, known as Halo: Around, and finally, in 2012, the release of the eighth Halo game will coincide with the apocalypse as predicted by the Mayans and Nostradamus.

After his 15 minutes of fame from acquiring a Piece of Eden by killing Al Mualim, Altaïr found it hard to make some cash. “Unable to actually use the Piece of Eden on my own, and with all of the Knights of the Templar dead, my assassin brother and I didn’t really have any work. Al Mualim was our leader so we didn’t know what to do after that. Things got hard,”  said Altaïr. Unable to feed himself from a dishonest day’s work, Altaïr started to rely on theft more than before to nourish himself day-to-day. “I eventually got caught got and couldn’t fight my way out of it. This one vendor had been suspicious of me stealing from him all month and finally caught me by having about 15 guards attack me and hold me down. I ran out of luck and I’m set to have a trial on the 27th of this month.”

In Batman’s most recent campaign against crime, he takes the fight to the villains and gets his hands dirty in Arkham Asylum. Due to the fact that the Joker trapped Batman in Arkham Asylum against his will and by surprise, no one is back at Wayne Manor to babysit pants-less Robin (Alfred went on vacation apparently). Since then, there have been those who have made attempts on the boy wonder’s life. Reports say that Robin defended himself from these henchmen by hiding in Wayne Manor and setting traps in various locations for the thugs. Traps included hot door handles, buckets of paint, and tar and feathers. The latest reports say that Robin is managing against these threats and will be on his own until the police figure out what to do about that whole bomb threat situation with the Joker.

EA has announced that the FIFA series of soccer video games will be canceled and FIFA 2010 will not be released due to financial pressures caused by the global recession. One spokesman went on record saying, “We are all in hard times together and EA Sports cannot afford to make any mistakes that could result in a financial loss. Seriously, who plays soccer anymore anyway? Be sure to pick up Madden 2010 though!”

Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 will feature a new online gaming mode called Douche Hunt, where the loudest players become the targets to eliminate. Players are given a douche rank by how loud and annoying they are. This rating stays with players and only goes down over a long period of time, even if a player stops using their headset. Also, there is currently a petition going around that supports adding this feature to Halo 3.

Local teen, Brian Windemere, is a little confused.

“I picked a HB Delay so I could wait till the hole opened up and just run through, but when I saw that my buddy Harry was calling a blitz, I audibled to a PA Pass. Harry would rush me like it was a run and I could just pass it to my sick wide receiver, but stupid @$$ Madden 2009 messed it up. When I hiked the ball, I passed to B but Harry’s DB intercepted it and ran it back for a 45 yard touchdown. What the f^@# is that? I picked the perfect play. There’s no way that was my fault. Madden 2009 is retarded. I’m selling this stupid game so I can buy 2010 when it comes out.”

Due to the high demand of airplanes in Battlefield 1943, a young entrepreneur by the name of Harris Worthington has started an in-game plane rental service to allow players to reserve planes for a small fee. Mr. Worthington and his workers basically grab every single plane from a match and sell them to customers for $0.50. Once customers are done with the planes, they die, or can return the plane to one of Mr. Worthington’s workers to recycle it and to get up to $0.15 back on their rental plane. So far, Mr. Worthington has made over $5,300 dollars off his little scheme, and you thought we were in a recession.